Glossary entry (derived from question below)
German term or phrase:
im Marke
English translation:
deep in my heart / right at the core of me [marrow]
Added to glossary by
Steffen Walter
Jan 13, 2009 18:08
15 yrs ago
1 viewer *
German term
Marke
German to English
Art/Literary
Music
This is from a Brahms Lied, "Die Schale der Vergessenheit". I can't get how "Marke" fits into the penultimate line. Thanks to all.
Und die lächelnde Lippe voll
Lautenklanges, des Haars schattige Wallungen,
Und das Beben der weißen Brust,
Und den siegenden Blick,
Der mir im Marke zuckt,
Tauch' ich tief in den Schlummerquell.
Und die lächelnde Lippe voll
Lautenklanges, des Haars schattige Wallungen,
Und das Beben der weißen Brust,
Und den siegenden Blick,
Der mir im Marke zuckt,
Tauch' ich tief in den Schlummerquell.
Proposed translations
(English)
| 3 +7 | deep in my heart / right at the core of me |
Helen Shiner
|
| 5 +1 | marrow |
mary austria
|
| 3 | innermost |
AA Berger
|
Change log
Jan 15, 2009 00:12: Helen Shiner Created KOG entry
Jan 17, 2009 23:02: Steffen Walter changed "Edited KOG entry" from "<a href="/profile/882779">Helen Shiner's</a> old entry - "Marke"" to ""deep in my heart / right at the core of me [marrow]""
Proposed translations
+7
7 mins
Helen Shiner
United Kingdom
United Kingdom
Native in English
United Kingdom
Arts/Academic translator - Art historian
Native in: English
Works in: German to English, French to English
Related KudoZ points
:
52
Selected
deep in my heart / right at the core of me
This is Mark as in marrow - it resonates with me, or whatever, right in my marrow would be a direct translation of the German but clearly won't do in English
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Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-13 23:38:42 GMT)
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I note your comment to mary in which you say you would like assistance with the second and third line from the bottom. If I am not being too presumptuous, how about 'sovereign gaze' for 'siegenden Blick', since 'victorious' sound strange. Another way might be 'conquering gaze', I suppose. Some suggestions for the second bit, some more tacky than others perhaps: 'which tugs at my heart strings', 'which stabs at my heart', 'which bores to the heart of me', 'cuts me to the quick', 'catches at my heart' though I know some of these do not get to the sense of the repetition of itching.
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Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-13 23:42:24 GMT)
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Or 'glance' rather than 'gaze' because it is near to 'lance' and wounding.
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Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-14 00:00:57 GMT)
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You have some good images there, erselking - I like the austere mistress. For me the verb relating to gaze/glance relates to the effect on the lover rather than what the woman does. How about 'sounds again in my marrow' - resonate sounds a little modern to me. Also I read the last bit as being all the above will happen 'as soon as I' or 'should/when I plunge deep into sleep's source/spring'. i.e. she haunts his dreams.
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Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-14 00:08:03 GMT)
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Other suggestions: 'And that sovereign glance which cuts again in my marrow, as deeply I plunge into sleep's well.'
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Note added at 6 hrs (2009-01-14 00:13:57 GMT)
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Or better: 'And that sovereign glance which cuts again at my marrow, as deeply I plunge into sleep's well.' Maybe there is something in the repetition three times of imagery relating to knives/blades. I'll stop now - you may be glad to hear - best of luck with this lovely project.
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Note added at 6 hrs (2009-01-14 01:07:07 GMT)
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Ok, you didn't give the first bit, so I wasn't aware of the drowning of her image in the river. Perhaps we are meant to understand that as he does so, he is able to fall deep asleep. I do think the last clause needs to be joined to what precedes it with an 'as'. Something along the lines of 'Plunging your image into the river (seeking forgetfulness) .... I fall asleep (attain oblivion)', just to sketch it roughly. But I am sure you know all this already! I just feel they are linked temporally - and now I must myself seek out that rest that only the river can bring!
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Note added at 1 day6 hrs (2009-01-15 00:13:27 GMT) Post-grading
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Thank you for the points, erselking - enjoy the rest of this lovely project.
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Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-13 23:38:42 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
I note your comment to mary in which you say you would like assistance with the second and third line from the bottom. If I am not being too presumptuous, how about 'sovereign gaze' for 'siegenden Blick', since 'victorious' sound strange. Another way might be 'conquering gaze', I suppose. Some suggestions for the second bit, some more tacky than others perhaps: 'which tugs at my heart strings', 'which stabs at my heart', 'which bores to the heart of me', 'cuts me to the quick', 'catches at my heart' though I know some of these do not get to the sense of the repetition of itching.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-13 23:42:24 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Or 'glance' rather than 'gaze' because it is near to 'lance' and wounding.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-14 00:00:57 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
You have some good images there, erselking - I like the austere mistress. For me the verb relating to gaze/glance relates to the effect on the lover rather than what the woman does. How about 'sounds again in my marrow' - resonate sounds a little modern to me. Also I read the last bit as being all the above will happen 'as soon as I' or 'should/when I plunge deep into sleep's source/spring'. i.e. she haunts his dreams.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 5 hrs (2009-01-14 00:08:03 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Other suggestions: 'And that sovereign glance which cuts again in my marrow, as deeply I plunge into sleep's well.'
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 6 hrs (2009-01-14 00:13:57 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Or better: 'And that sovereign glance which cuts again at my marrow, as deeply I plunge into sleep's well.' Maybe there is something in the repetition three times of imagery relating to knives/blades. I'll stop now - you may be glad to hear - best of luck with this lovely project.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 6 hrs (2009-01-14 01:07:07 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Ok, you didn't give the first bit, so I wasn't aware of the drowning of her image in the river. Perhaps we are meant to understand that as he does so, he is able to fall deep asleep. I do think the last clause needs to be joined to what precedes it with an 'as'. Something along the lines of 'Plunging your image into the river (seeking forgetfulness) .... I fall asleep (attain oblivion)', just to sketch it roughly. But I am sure you know all this already! I just feel they are linked temporally - and now I must myself seek out that rest that only the river can bring!
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 day6 hrs (2009-01-15 00:13:27 GMT) Post-grading
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Thank you for the points, erselking - enjoy the rest of this lovely project.
Note from asker:
| Would this half do? Ha! There will I plunge your image, Austere mistress; And your smiling lips full of Lute-music, your hair's shadowy waves, And the quivering of your white breast, And that triumphant gaze That resonates to my marrow, I will plunge deep into the spring of slumber. |
| Thanks for your gracious help. I haven't quoted the entire text, but we must keep in mind here that we're talking about the mythical river Lethe, which brings oblivion and forgetfulness. Isn't he - as the quoted portion states - plunging her image into the stream (Dann tauch' ich dein Bild) - the image of her lips, her hair, her breast, her gaze. Isn't he trying to bury all this - at least figuratively - into the Lethe so that he can rest from his tormented love? |
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
Comment: "Thanks for your valuable help."
+1
5 mins
marrow
Das Mark: bone marrow!
Note from asker:
| No,no, I would appreciate help in getting the second and third line from the bottom into the appropriately "poetic" English. |
Peer comment(s):
| neutral |
Helen Shiner
: snap, but it won't fit very well in English
3 mins
|
| agree |
StefanieGreen
: I was just about to write the same when i saw you already posted it! Very good!
3 mins
|
|
Thanks, Stefanie! I'm so sorry I beat you to the punch!
|
16 hrs
innermost
German 'ins Mark' = deep into the heart, like said in the previous answers
but '(my) innermost' is shorter, so it might fit better into a poem ...?
but '(my) innermost' is shorter, so it might fit better into a poem ...?
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