沈香も焚かず屁もひらず

English translation: I see your translation is sufficiently fine.

21:41 Jul 16, 2012
Japanese to English translations [PRO]
Religion
Japanese term or phrase: 沈香も焚かず屁もひらず
... 要するに沈香も焚かず屁もひらずという、平均的人間ができるだけだ。
I know what it means, have researched it a bit and am aware of some instances of the usage of this phrase, in haiku and in more common usage.
So, what I am looking for is some feedback or opinions...

My current translation:
...in other words, the outcome will be someone who “neither wafts a fragrant breeze, nor cuts the cheese”, that is to say, an utterly average human being.

The writer is a religious leader who seems to be trying to keep his readers on their toes by mixing in poetic phrases, colloquial sayings, slightly spicy expressions and such here and there, perhaps to take the edge off all the heavy karma talk.
So, I am of two minds, either to go with my admittedly frivolous attempt above, or to try something a bit more staid.

Or, something in between that might work better...?
Seth Yarden
United States
Local time: 12:53
English translation:I see your translation is sufficiently fine.
Explanation:
If you want something more to it or to arrange it another way, how about the ones below?

"someone who neither burns an incense to waft a fragrant aroma......"

or

"someone who neither burns a fragrant incense......"

Incense will remind readers of a scene in Buddhist temples and it might set a slightly religious tone for the sentence.
But I still guess your attempt is good enough.
Selected response from:

Akiteru Sasayama
Japan
Local time: 01:53
Grading comment
Thank you for your constructive advice!
I will now consider changing it to "a fragrant incense" or something like that.

(jgraves made a similar comment earlier, in as a discussion entry, but I guess it's not possible to give Kudoz for that...)
3 KudoZ points were awarded for this answer



Summary of answers provided
3 His faults are few, but so are his virtues
Misae Lucasey
3He who makes no mistakes makes nothing
cinefil
3I see your translation is sufficiently fine.
Akiteru Sasayama
Summary of reference entries provided
FYI
cinefil

Discussion entries: 3





  

Answers


11 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5
 His faults are few, but so are his virtues


Explanation:
I think your translation is good enough!

"He is a man of one who never made mistake, never made anything, so he has no merits or faults."

Misae Lucasey
United States
Local time: 09:53
Native speaker of: Native in JapaneseJapanese
Notes to answerer
Asker: Thank you!

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22 mins   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5
He who makes no mistakes makes nothing


Explanation:
http://blogs.yahoo.co.jp/miyo626/7027844.html

cinefil
Japan
Local time: 01:53
Native speaker of: Native in JapaneseJapanese
PRO pts in category: 8
Notes to answerer
Asker: thanks!

Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)

33 days   confidence: Answerer confidence 3/5Answerer confidence 3/5
I see your translation is sufficiently fine.


Explanation:
If you want something more to it or to arrange it another way, how about the ones below?

"someone who neither burns an incense to waft a fragrant aroma......"

or

"someone who neither burns a fragrant incense......"

Incense will remind readers of a scene in Buddhist temples and it might set a slightly religious tone for the sentence.
But I still guess your attempt is good enough.

Akiteru Sasayama
Japan
Local time: 01:53
Specializes in field
Native speaker of: Japanese
PRO pts in category: 3
Grading comment
Thank you for your constructive advice!
I will now consider changing it to "a fragrant incense" or something like that.

(jgraves made a similar comment earlier, in as a discussion entry, but I guess it's not possible to give Kudoz for that...)
Login to enter a peer comment (or grade)




Reference comments


19 mins
Reference: FYI

Reference information:
沈香も焚かず屁(へ)もひらずといったところだよ, あの男は. It is true that there is nothing much to criticize in him, but there is very little to recommend him either.
http://ejje.weblio.jp/content/沈香

http://www.websaru.info/沈香も焚かず屁も放らず.html

cinefil
Japan
Native speaker of: Native in JapaneseJapanese
PRO pts in category: 8
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